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Join A Dangerous Clinical Trial

Ever dream of being on the cutting-edge of medicine-- and at the same time avoid debtor's prison? Now you can, with our brand-new dangerous clinical trials, open to volunteers. Test out medications that may or may not kill you, surgical procedures you don't need, or be guinea pigs for blind doctors performing their very first circumcisions. No matter your interest, we have a trial for you-- and a 96-page legal document for you to sign waiving your right to sue us, no matter what goes wrong. Sound enticing? We thought so. Free tote bag.